When I went to school I have been bullied. I have also encountered it online as well on social sites and in various MMO (Massive Multiplayer Online) games. There’s quite a number of common characteristics among bullies today I have personally noticed.
1. “He/She/They is/are psycho!“- This one occurs quite often among “EXes”. This is used to slandeer and “trash talk” the other. Often used to gain sympathy and avoid responsibility for their fault in a matter. Sometimes it gives a feeling of empowerment to the one being the bully.
2. “They’re all the same person.”- This is perhaps one of the most common things said by bullies I have ever heard. This is mostly said when there is usually 2 or more people defending the one they are bullying. Bullies don’t like to be called out on their own sins. So to make themselves feel better and in an attempt to look good to their own friends… this claim is used to give them a false confidence.Most bullies who use this will make this claim and this refer to their victim and those they know as individuals. If they’re all “the same person” then why at any point refer to them individually? Hmmm? Good question indeed. It only shows indication of their tactic to bully.
3. “U mad bro?” or “U mad.”- Not always used to bully, but commonly said by bullies to “rally the group” to their side by calling attention to them. This opens the door for the bully to say or do anything to get more people to assist him/her.
4. Accusing their victim of the very sins they are guilty of. Used to avoid feeling guilty or responsible for their own actions so they push their sins and faults off on to their victim by making them feel responsible and/or making it look like to others that their victim is responsible.
5. The classic trash talking. Fairly simple. Bad mouthing the one being bullied.
6. Participating in the spreading of rumors and/or trash talk. This makes the bullying worse. It’s used to also discredit the victim so the rumors and trash talk will appear to be more true. Also used to get more people involved to spread the bullies’ hate.
7. Twisting the truth. Twisted to whatever makes the bully himself/herself look like the victim instead.
8. Lying. Very common among bullies. They start out with a small lie to get the trash talk going . Then as time goes on the lies get bigger and juicier. Often times this is done gradually so it looks believable. Often done to discredit the victim so should they speak up, no one will listen.
9. “It’s no big deal. Quit whining.”. Said all to often to the one being bullied to further degrade them and make them feel like it’s their fault.
10. “He/She is just a kid. If you, an adult, feels bullied by a kid something is wrong with you.”. NOT TRUE! I’ve come across kids that will bully adults because many people in general seem to think that “adults can’t be bullied: and that adults who are bullied have obviously done something to deserve it. NEWS FLASH! They can. ANYONE can be bullied regardless of age.
11. “Are you 12?”. This is usually followed by an LOL or something the bully thinks is witty. This tactic is meant to get the person to respond in hopes they will rage upon them so they can turn the tables. Classic bully manipulation.
12. “It’s editted!”. Alot of the times bullies will demand to see proof. Much of the time they think the person won’t show it because they believe their victim is afraid to show their own humiliation. But on the off chance proof is shown, a claim of editting is made. The bully will say and do anything to get others to believe such.
13. Extreme vulgarity and/or racist and/or homophobic remarks. Some bullies will use extreme language when they harass/bully their victim. One of the reasons for this is either the victim will not produce proof due to vulgarity and if the image of proof was reported it would disappear quick due to the vulgarity. OR.. if shown then much of what is said would be blocked out.
14. Private messages of intimidation or threats. Some will send private messages being rude, nasty, and/or threatening. They will keep the majority of what they say private so anything said publicly will lean in their favor in their attempt to play the victim.
Bullying occurs for many reasons. Some reasons I have observed are:
1. Jealousy- the victim has something the bully wants and either can’t have or the victim got first through legitimate means.
2. Wants attention- The bully wants it. That’s obvious. To get it he/she might particpate with other bullies in discreditting their victim. Or just get a victim of their own.
There is NEVER a right or good reason to bully another. Those who bully often never think about how their bullying affects others. It sickens me how some bullies are actually proud of what they do; how they try to play the victim and make what they’re doing look justified… like it’s not even bullying.
If you are being being or see someone being bullied then SPEAK UP and do something about it because silence is not always golden.